I recently read the book Brave, Not Perfect by Reshma Saujani and it really struck a chord with me. To be honest, I was scanning the Libby app to find a book to read and was surprised to find a self-help book with a female author with a South Asian name. And literally, that’s why I borrowed it. I was hoping that an author with a similar background to me might be able to see things from a perspective that I could relate to.
As I read her words about children in a playground and the difference of what is expected between boys and girls in a playground, I knew I had found someone I wanted to pay attention to. She tells the story as a part of her TedTalk:
And as much as the first part of the book had me nodding my head as I found I could see myself in a lot of the stories she told, it is the third part of the book that holds the most value. In this section, she shares some tips for building up our bravery as girls. In the book, she shares that Rha Goddess, who calls herself an entrepreneurial soul coach, suggests that when your fears crop up you should ask:
“Is that your drama or your wisdom talking?”
How do you tell the difference? She talks about tapping into the energy of the feeling. If it feels calm, collected, and grounded, it is wisdom. If, on the other hand, it feels nervous, scattered, and erratic, it is drama.
Since a huge part of my healing journey has been about learning to feel my feelings, this tip made a huge impact on me. I hope it helps you too!
PS – if you struggle with naming feelings, I found this drawing from Mellow Doodles super helpful – I know, I know it sounds silly.